UNKNOWN - VI

I wish everything stopped for a while , as i struggled to be in time
i m chasing my life ...but all i end up with ...something that is not worth 
my efforts..
I see her from a distance waiting for my arrival....this is the first time...
i was late .....otherwise .....i could be seen waiting there for hours ...


I just fasten up my steps to reach up quickly to be beside her.....
I reach and i stood next to her ...waiting to be noticed ...but maybe she ignored
She seemed upset ..
Maybe just because i came late ....I thought....


I got down on my knees ....and streched my ears ..to make her realize i was sorry 
for making her wait...
But she still ignored....


At last , she broke her silence .....
and said...
I think , you can live without me ......
Now , its the time that i should leave....you alone 
and choose whosoever you want to make the part of your life...


Now, hearing all that , made me give up on my efforts....
to make her believe in my feelings...
Its not that i got over her...its just that i have got over the feeling to make her 
believe in....
I still have the feelings for her...but i dnt think they worth anything for her...


I just said.." I did what all i could do , hurting you as least as possible....
and i did stopped myself from hurting you more..."


I want you to be the part of my life...but i think its too much to you.....
as what all i have to give you....is not enough..


I did , what all i could do .....


She got frustrated ...and yelled 
" you did nothing , you are all involved in your dreams 
all you care about is you ...and no-one else ...."
WE can never be together....be it your world or mine...


Will you meet me again ? i asked ...
"I dnt want to see your face ...and i ll ignore you as if i dnt know you...,
if you ever come across me...in future.."


She disappeared leaving the drops ...in the air......
as i came back to reality ..getting illusioned by those drops ...on the glassy entranced 
sprinkled ..as it was getting cleaned by some worker ....


After all this , the wish to see her strengthened in me....
as it had been days ...since i last met her...


i walked on ..to find some way to reach her place....
while walking down the distance from the market to her place ....


I thought all about ....what all i would say to her....
try to make her realize , she did wrong or make her realize in feelings....I
have for her...
and how difficult is it for me ....to live without her......


will she accept me back ?
will she accept my love ?


will i be someone important in her life ?
will she make me a part of her life ?


all these questions , i feared off .


and i reached the midway of the road..on the divider ..
i looked up ....and saw her coming on her vehicle ...wearing RED....
i recognized her from her eyes ...with her head and face covered......


I didnt looked back....as i was unable to hold back my tears ....
Maybe she slowed down or stopped or simply moved on..
I stood there ...till she was gone....


I so much , to talk to her 
so much to tell....but i remembered what she said about ignoring me
i feared ...if she did ignored , i wont be able to live anymore....


i know , i have to die one day....earlier than everyone else....
but the times like these ....makes me vurnerable to end it now.....


I felt all alone..again......